We went back to the beach today, there's one not too far from Carolyn's house. The temperatures were finally back in the 70's but there weren't that many people there. Bella had a blast, setting herself down to dig a hole. Chris tried to show her how to mound the sand up into a basic castle, but she had more fun grabbing handfuls and moving them from one side to the other.

Unlike Connor, she didn't try to eat any.

I walked around a little taking photos of the surf rolling in, and more than a few of Bella and Chris. I even posed for a few when Chris all but commandeered the camera for a few minutes. At least if I get around to working on Bella's scrapbook, she'll have a few pics of her mother in there too.

Chris and I got around to doing a little talking too. Mostly we talked about the past couple days and how it feels good to be making the effort. For the first time I got the feeling he's just as scared as I am. Making this marriage work has got to be something we both want with all our hearts. Maybe today we finally got around to realizing that.

He suggested talking to someone else. I hope he doesn't mean Ronnie, I know she'd see us in a minute but if we're going to get professional help, I don't want someone who's dealt with most of Chris' past baggage. When we first decided to remarry, we talked about making a fresh start. I think that's a good idea when it comes to a therapist or a counsellor too. We need someone who can be totally objective.

I'm not against seeing someone, but first I really want to see if we can do this on our own. I know I love him and he loves me. That's a good start.